Realistic Ways to Balance “Momminess” & “Sexiness” (On Mother’s Day & Beyond)- Guest post by author Lori Verni-Fogarsi

It is MAY 1st and I have decided that this is the month that I seriously start putting on my oxygen mask first! If you read this blog, you know I have been toying around with this for a while now. So why then all the sudden am I so gun ho? Well… I read this great fictional novel  called, “MOMNESIA” and let’s just say it hit home! You guys have to read this book! It is a quick light read that is funny yet at the same time will make you stop and think! If you are a mom, plan on becoming a mom or have a mom… YOU HAVE TO READ THIS BOOK! Do yourself a favor and buy yourself a copy for Mother’s Day… you won’t be sorry you did!

Anyway, I am fortunate to actually know the fabulous author of this book and was able to charm her into agreeing to do a little post for us here! Yes folks… I am very excited to share with you this incredibly insightful, entertaining and funny guest post by the author of the hot new Novel (my new favorite book) “Momnesia,” Lori Verni-Fogarsi. Lori has been a freelance writer, columnist, journalist, and seminar speaker for 15+ years, and has authored one nonfiction book, “Everything You Need to Know About House Training Puppies and Adult Dogs,” which has been widely acclaimed in its genre. Lori is a happily married mom of two, step mom of two more, and has two cats, both rotten. You are in for a real treat folks. So pour yourself a cup of coffee, kick off your shoes, get comfy and get ready to read a great post. Then afterwards make sure to leave a comment here for Lori telling her what you think. Lori  also invites you to learn more about her and her books at and join her on Facebook at; Twitter:; Pinterest: and her Blog:

So without further ado, I present to you Lori and her article written especially for Mama’s Turn Now (I feel so special and so should you!):

Realistic Ways to Balance “Momminess” & “Sexiness”                     (On Mother’s Day & Beyond)

 “Balancing momminess and sexiness? Yeah, right!” This is the most common response I hear when I tell people about my novel, “Momnesia.” Until people read it, of course, at which point their response changes to, “The woman in that book is living my life!”

It’s about an unconventional entrepreneur who, struggling between her “momminess” & her “sexiness,” diagnoses herself with Momnesia and sets about finessing a new version of her old vivaciousness. Basically, she is my hero.

However, I’m a realistic person. Let’s face it… I’ve got four kids! Two daughters, 11 & 14, and two step sons, 17 & 19. Not to mention two cats, two houses, and two husbands (although not simultaneously of course!). Are you noticing a theme here? There are two of everyone else, but only one of me. Yikes!

To top it off, one of my daughters has ADHD and while she is a fantastic kid, I’ve seriously considered creating a recording that plays in a continuous loop, “Don’t forget… you’re in there to brush your teeth. Are you almost done?” I could save my voice by playing this every morning between 6:30 – 7:30 am and every night from 8:30 – 9:30 pm. In fact, I could probably develop a multi-pack CD set including many popular phrases like, “Remember, we’re leaving in five minutes!” and “Your homework needs to go directly INTO your backpack.”

Yet I did say that I’m a realistic person. I’m also a fact-oriented person and when it comes to making choices, my default response is to ask myself, “Which is worse?” Sure, life is exhausting. Between work, family, household responsibilities, and the multitude of additional exercises of my patience, it would be very easy (and has been in the past) to just put my Self off for another time—some fictional day in the future when I’ll finally have time to pursue my own interests (also known as both shampooing my hair and shaving my legs in the same shower).

At the same time, I got to a point where I missed Myself, and when push came to shove the answer to “Which is worse?” was, for me, that it’s even more exhausting to live my life to the complete exclusion of Myself than it is to find ways to treat myself well on a daily basis.

So I decided to come up with what I call Small Daily Decadences. Sure, it would be nice to go to a spa retreat for a weekend with my girlfriends, but I can’t sit around waiting for that to happen! Instead, I integrate small, manageable things to my daily life, which I have found make me feel more relaxed, less resentful, and more energetic overall!

For example, I personally feel like drinking coffee in bed is a super decadent thing. So in the morning, instead of staying downstairs in the kitchen with my coffee, I bring it back up to the bedroom to sip it (albeit still yelling down the hall, “Don’t forget, you’re in there to brush your teeth!…”). It may seem like a small thing, but for me, it makes me feel like I’ve started my day doing something really special for myself.

Other things I enjoy include lighting scented candles even when no company is coming, wearing my “big girl” clothes instead of “saving them” for some fictional day, eating a Hershey’s kiss and actually taking a moment to savor it, and drawing the line with my kids at certain times in the evenings and on weekends when they know that it’s Mommy’s time and no, I do not want to play Twister (again), thank you very much!

What about you? Can you think of some Small Daily Decadences you can implement into your life? (Feel free to share them by commenting below!) Maybe your gift to yourself could be to start them on Mother’s Day and commit to do them well beyond! I look forward to hearing your ideas!



4 thoughts on “Realistic Ways to Balance “Momminess” & “Sexiness” (On Mother’s Day & Beyond)- Guest post by author Lori Verni-Fogarsi

  1. What an amazing article! This is exactly what we’ve been saying at The Oxygen Mask Project…small daily decadence. I love it. Thank you for writing this!

  2. I can SO relate to this lol. I’m a Mum of one, our one has a global delay with Odd & traits of autism. He is the sweetest kid around.. However a handful at times. As much as i love being a mummy, it’s so easy to lose yourself in being a Mother.

    I will have to adopt this 😉 just got to decide what to do each day for me now 😉

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